Jun 162011

PetPeeve wrote:
> Katia: decide you’d rather wash down the cake with more cake.

IT’S NOT WORKING.

(But tastes sooo good)

lexavian wrote:
Katia: realize that most adults that can handle their alcohol want to drink it. You have put her out a bit before this, it’s reasonable for her not to drink water. Plus, it proves her confidence in you that she doesn’t need to drink water. It’s like when a dad tells a kid that he’s not going to let go of the kid’s bike when teaching him to ride and then he does let go anyway. And you know what that kid usually does? He rides that bike like no person has ever ridden a bike before! Ok, maybe not that good, but he still does well!

You… guess that’s one way to look at it?

Even then, it would still hurt you a lot if Quill-Weave lied to you. You don’t want friends who play tricks on you, or gamble with your life, or break promises “for a good cause”. You just want friends who respect you and don’t treat you like trash. Part of that, in your mind, is honesty. You even felt a little bad when Trevaia tried to trick you with the flask of water.

But then again, you are in no position to choose your friends. Maybe someone like you just has to take what she can get when it comes to friendship. Maybe they’ll be good friends, maybe they’ll be terrible friends. You like to think Quill-Weave is one of the good ones. You know she is.

This line of thought is making you sad. You need a drink. Of water. So you can eat more cake.


frostedWarlock wrote:
Katia: Wonder why your brain is trying so hard to distrust Quill-Weave over something as basic as a glass of water.

Seriously, that is getting pretty weird. You don’t know why you keep thinking she spiked the water. Quill-Weave specifically said she wasn’t going to drink alcohol, and you believe her. Yet this unsettling feeling of doubt continues to linger in the back of your mind.

You’re going to show yourself that there’s nothing to be afraid of and that Quill-Weave is a great friend who would never tell you a lie. You’re going to take an inconspicuous, apparently accidental gulp of this water and then continue eating this delicious cake. And you’ll be fine. You’ll see.


SushiJaguar wrote:
Katia: Drink the water, drink it down.


^(click the link!)
Or, if your device cannot play Flash, view a summary here!

(Music credit: Suidakra – Dead Man’s Reel
cropped by Adam Sterling)


>




  • LehkiBug

    “Sometimes, criminals are dogs.” I don’t even what to say, that was simply hilarious.

  • Lieutenant Fish

    If you didn’t replay the flash at least once to get another look at Q-W’s head turn animation, you can’t be my friend.

    • http://www.botaram.com JJA

      I’ve replayed it many times and admired it. Does this mean I have to be your friend?

      • ZizZazZuz

        Yes. Just for the record, I thought that whole sequence was her drunken hallucinations the first time through.

    • Felidire

      Each time I was too busy admiring the tongue. >.>;

      • Burgrus of Corgi

        That IS a rather intriguingly magnificent tongue.

      • MentallyUnstable

        Is this a bad time to mention that I am a furry?

        • Jindrow

          it is never a bad time.

    • Kingdaro

      ARE YOU A WIZARD?

    • manarim

      Better the first time around. Must keep the very magnificent magnificence of the Imperial Legion fresh.

  • Lisa

    I’m kinda mad at my friends telling me I need to know oblivion tto read this comic, I missed out on an awsm comic for quiet some time here :I

    *loved the animation, love the guard hope he’ll show up again in the future xD

    and if Katia wasn’t sure it’s just water she could’ve sniffed on it before drinking just to make sure?
    I’m just glad nothing happened :3

    • Ulminati

      @Lisa

      Well, there are a bunch of subtle things you miss out on if you haven’t played Oblivion. for one ASOTIL becomes even more hilarious when you realize he is the distilled essence of every guard in Oblivion. You would also have a good idea of who Capital S is (spoiler), as well as who Quill-weaves mystery friend would be (spoiler ).

      • NoriMori

        Yeah, but just because we miss out on those little things doesn’t mean we should play Oblivion before reading this. I don’t know ANYTHING about and I don’t get ANY of the references, but I love Prequel to little bitty BITS!

        • A Pissed Off Russian

          Actually, don’t play Oblivion! It’s kind of awful, especially without mods. There is one that completely reworks it and makes it totally awesome though! I forget the name, but it was made by a bunch of german dudes in 2007.

          • RepairmanDave

            Are you talking about Nehrim?

          • Worm Anchorite

            Noooo! Nononononofreakin’ NO!!!
            I agree, Oblivion is absolutley NOT the best of the (5) TES- games, but it IS quite awesome. I would NEVER reccomend anybody who has the tiniest bit of interest in TES lore or… Well, just TES to NOT play Oblivion. It has a quite cool storyline, and a whole bunch of nice sidequests. Though if you got introduced to the Elder Scrolls universe through Skyrim, the graphics might be a bit frustating(yet way better than in Morrowind, which is considered by many as the best TES game), and there is a few other flawes, yes, but… Just.. No. I needed to say that, I think Oblivion is a terrific game. And I, uh… I just couldn’t let that horrible post… BE there, with nobody replying and god damn it this post got way too long, now nobody’s gonna read it… -.-

          • Gordion

            FOOL OBLIVION IS THE BEST

  • http://www.furaffinity.net/user/hellkat/ Von Krieger

    Looking through these now on the website rather than the thread. I’m still laughing over the video. I remember I damned near made myself sick on my first viewing of Astoil’s entrance.

  • Faren

    I am saving this, I’m getting an addon to rip it from the site and I AM saving this flash. I am also going to join the imperial legion. 8T

  • matty406

    SUDDENLY AWESOME SPILLED FROM THE SCREEN
    CRIMINAL SCUM
    AAAAAAA

  • Bob

    That is probably the best flash I’ve watched since Newgrounds started going downhill.
    Now we just need some suitable Cyrodillic lyics;
    “Oh, you take the Blue Road and I’ll take the Silver,
    And I’ll be in Skyrim before you,
    Where me an’ my true love will never meet again,
    On the bonny, bonny banks of Loch Rumare”

    • Dalen Vreth

      …. *gives you all my internets*

  • Skullman

    And suddenly Awesome turned to Shenanigous.

    • Zerp

      And yet was still awesome simultaneously.

  • Ickorus

    I accidentally turned my sound up or something because when the animation started it was really loud and scared the crap out of me.

    • creeperbro

      I know how that feels bro

      But really now I have goosebumps…

      And a pair of seriously fucked up earbuds.

  • Tirien

    This. Is. Win.

    This should be a recruitment video.

    • Dragatus

      “Sometimes, criminals are dogs. True JUSTICE does not discriminate. True justice is that lighty beacon of light in a world of prejudice and disorder, where not even the innocent are safe. But rest assured, the Legion is here to uphold the law.

      Join us!”

      Seriosuly though, this was awesome and it went much much MUCH better than I expected.

  • megalomaniacalHalide

    I am so very, very sorry, but when saw the flash, I had to just change it a little.
    I hope you do not mind. The following contains what I did to it.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yrjHMr51C-c

    • Zerp

      YES. YESSSSSS.

      • Evangle

        That song goes with everything… would that be cheating?

        • Burgrus of Corgi

          It’s never cheating when something goes with everything, otherwise it’d always be cheating and no one would enjoy it, therefore making it impossible to go with anything. And if something can’t go with anything, then it can’t go with everything, meaning that it never went with anything to begin with, so it wasn’t cheating in the first place, it was just a bad choice.

          I just accidentally my head.

  • DeeJayDragon

    Where can I get this awesome, kick-ass music?

    • DeeJayDragon

      Never mind, I found it.

      • Kazerad

        I’m thinking of moving the music credits onto the flash pages themselves, since a lot of people seem to have trouble finding them. Or maybe I’ll add a little “CREDITS” label overtop them? I’m not sure yet, but it’s something I definitely want to fix.

        Apparently on the Facebook group there’s a rumor circulating that I wrote the song on Imp: Enjoy Hobby? That’s totally a sign that I need to credit better.

  • Emillie Wolf

    Epic ! Just Epic !

  • Grey Acumen

    Okay… this was sheer brilliance. Everything up to this just had me going “okay, when is she finally going to end up drunk” and so the guard was a complete absolute out of left field moment that i stripped gears trying to change course, and my god that personality is beautiful. He’s like a freaking medieval buzz lightyear, and when he sidled up to the countess, I just totally lost it.

    This… this was beautiful, and absolute poetry in it’s execution. I am now absolutely looking forward to reading the rest of this, and dreading when I finally catch up with the archives.

  • Blast

    I…

    I was not expecting that.

    My face hurts.

  • http://www.saisasylum.com Sai

    Oh my, the animation that went along with this one was priceless. I laughed til I cried.

  • Servus

    XDDDDDDD Forever i am laughing at the sheer left field of this. i was expecting a Q-W “Noooooo” then a black out. and then the amaingness that is that guy was sheer awesome.

  • who149

    This is one of the highest points, in a trully amazing comic. I have to keep watching it over and over again.

  • Anghor

    Asotil to the rescue xD

  • Train Car

    My faith in the author’s dramatic sense of storytelling has been restored. Ignore my last comment a couple pages back.

    • Woundedkneecap

      Never, criminal scum!

  • TechUnadept

    Amelia Saillune called, she wants her personality back…

    • Tsukistar

      Oh god I know this is from 2011, but if you get wind of this reply through email, just know that i may or may not absolutely love Slayers.

  • DataShade

    Wait … do the guards in Oblivion ever drag prisoners into a palace, or is this just a very obfuscated cat-joke?

    • Dragatus

      No, they don’t drag prisoners into a palace. In fact they don’t even take prisoners (except for the player). They just kill the criminal scum and let the body rot.

  • LaikaRising

    That made my night, so good!

  • NoriMori

    Oh thank God. Disaster keeps being narrowly averted. Let’s keep things that way, hmm? Although granted, there is hardly any rum in that glass. It was mostly water even before Quill-Weave poured some rum into it, and then she drank most of that before it was refilled with MORE water. There is like no way Katia’d get drunk from that.

    But still. Way to build suspense. XD

  • RedRockRun

    Do you have something against dogs? First you describe the imp as having the brain of a dog. Then you have Kat’s Amulet of Silence contain the soul of a puppy, and now this.

    Has me wondering…

    • PriffyViole

      I think that was just an implication that Traven killed a puppy.

    • Anonimaly

      (My belief about reality says) it’s really just that she needed an animal whose intelligence everyone is familiar with and is also common in Tamriel, and here it was just to highlight that dogs are one of the things running around that incompetent I.L. guards tend to hit by accident.

  • Ninjamaster_255

    i was a bit upset that katia was being railroaded her strait to drunken trouble but apparently this is what the author was working toward all along

  • Someone Somewhere

    I just want to say… I’m joining the Imperial Legion in Skyrim now because of this video. All because of this video. I was on the fence for a while, but then this video happened. I shall hunt down CRIMINAL SCUM in the name of this brave legionary.

    • Leold

      I just started reading this comic today, but I so want to create Asotil in Skyrim now! He’ll butcher bandits, ruin banquets, and cry manly tears when speaking of True Justice!

  • http://Sly-The-Foxx.deviantart.com SlyTheFoxx

    One of those things that make you go DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN

    I think i’m giong to make another character now… Call him Garen. Have him be a Knight and join the imperial army <3

    Or maybe a pirate… eaten oranges all day long.

    /LoL References

  • Christopher

    Love the single frame of “PSYCHED” the moment the door is kicked down …

  • Link

    God, I’m re-reading the comic a bit and this part still takes the prize as the most awesome thing in the history of of all things =D
    Laughing so hard I tear up every time I watch that flash!

    In a way it makes me believe even more that Katia is stalked by Sheogorath and Sanguine, only they could produce this much awesome hilarity in Tamriel xD Or perhaps Kazerad is the new Daedric prince of the Unexpected ;)

  • StClair

    That. Was. Awesome.
    (Especially because I can totally hear Wes Johnson delivering the guard’s lines. With extra ham.)

  • FireHeart

    That was spectacular. I couldn’t stop laughing!

  • Spielmann

    I was DEFINITELY NOT expecting that AT ALL X’D

  • JayBird

    That was… super duper exciting.

    Also, this is like the third night in a row I’ve read about Katia instead of going to bed at a reasonable hour. WHY IS THIS SO ADDICTIVE!?!

  • Bro.

    Neat.

  • Sara

    Oh god, I laughed so much I nearly peed myself, that was funny as hell..
    I was sooooo afraid she’d drink it and ruin everything and be sad again. :(
    Never been so glad to see an Imperial Guard before.. <3

  • Doschx

    So… did anyone else read that legionnaire’s lines in Coach McGuirk’s voice? “BRENDON!”

    also… epic Frieza face by the countess. “What!? Vegeta!?”

  • http://www.lordsofepic.org Ethanthecrazy

    Oh, my god.
    So much relief.
    I was seriously about to cry.

  • Dark

    Oh my god. So awesome.

  • Dipintus

    That was… unexpected.
    Also awesome.

  • Lightning

    Omg, that was too freaking epic! I was totally not expecting that! I have tears running down my face from laughing so hard..

    Awesome story!

  • Rodrigo

    That soldier’s my 2nd favourite soldier in town now.

  • Korri

    Why isn’t this a show???

  • Akamadoushi

    Congratulations, Katia. Dinner was totally ruined and it had absolutely nothing to do with you. Success!

  • monstdrumm

    lulz xD
    this was … there are no word for this epicness :D

  • Yuri

    Holy crap that was awesome! And the music fits so well!

  • Yuri

    Edit: Also I love the castle guard’s expression

  • GentleCorgy’s#7COMBO

    O-O
    That was unexpecting, but looks like the prayer for luck worked after all.
    That or maybe yor robe is made entierly out of four-leaf clovers! :)

  • Kajex(

    YES!!! EPIC IMPERIAL LEGION SAVE!!!

  • TechSmurf

    I keep going back to rewatch this and it’s still making me crack up.

  • DKD

    Holy crap that WAS AWESOME!

  • patrick

    he stopped those criminal scum. i can just picture him doing the poses and the such to the whole, “stop! you have violated the law!” bit.

  • Alceris

    Well something just happened, and I’m not entirely sure what.

  • Erhannis

    AHAHAHAHA, oh man, over the past few days, I’ve watched this thing around 21 times now. I lost proper count at about 16.

  • alrie

    Oh. My. GODS.

    That is freakin awesome! I was laughing so hard my dad leaned and looked at my computer with this “WTF?” look on his face.

    Also, is it just to make the character consistent and so she has a background, or has their been previous adventures with Katia on previous games that are on the internet. Because I’d say that they are just things for her background, but there are little things that I get the feeling I’m missing out on something on. And yes, I’ve played Oblivon and Skyrim, and at least a couple of hours of the earlier ones (and read lore online).

    • Kazerad

      Thank you! =D glad you are enjoying this.

      And yeah, this is the first thing I’ve made with Katia. All the stuff about her background was created for this story.

      • alrieice

        Hehehe, you are welcome.

        And, okay, I was just wondering. I realized as I was reading more that the things I was talking about were things that had happened in the adventure but had forgotten about (that’s what I get for taking a little time off).

        And I might do some fanart soon of Katia and Quill being BFFs. I love those two together.

  • ZStarlight

    When he was by the countess’s side, I could see him saying “Criminal scum…Criminal scum everywhere”

    Amazing… just amazing

  • NobleType

    That was pure epicness there. I forgot how awesomely deadly guards can be.

  • Spatzist

    I haven’t laughed this hard in… weeks, at least. Best. Ending. Ever.

  • TheTurnipKing

    Wow. People flipped out and caused a scene. And not one of them was you, Katia!

    This town is apparently just /full/ of freaks. An irrational fear of royalty and incredible misfortune can only make you fit in even better.

  • MASDERCHEEF

    That Imperial Soldier is now one of my favorite characters in this, second only to Katia.

  • Antaeus

    When it came time to watch the video, I hesitated. Not gunna lie. Then I saw the fade to black…

    And instant ‘wtf’ face occurred. I watched the video and I read the dialogue, but there was zero input. In my mind, I was standing out in left field in Yankee Stadium with the French going, “Where the SHIT did that come from?!”

    Then I watched it again and… you folks had your voices, I had him speaking like Sylvester Stallone from Judge Dredd, ESPECIALLY his last line:

    “The Legion is here to uphold DUH LAW!”

  • GreatFairy

    I was staring at the animation for at least five seconds before I fully comprehended what had just happened. Then I had to replay it because I was laughing so hard I had no idea what had just happened. I love you.

  • hostergaard

    Now there is how you make an entree! Re-reading the comic and that flash animation is still the most awesome thing I have ever seen.

    The the music, and the timing of it, just fit perfect and the animation is fantastic, the simplistic style is incredible well done. Only someone with great talent could make it work like that. Praise where praise is due, love you stuff Kaz!

  • Vercalos

    OW MY EARS

  • JRCameron

    …What’s a bike?

    I played through Oblivion and Skyrim, but I never once saw a bicycle.

    So, how would she get that reference? Are there bikes in Morrowind?

  • http://NO NO

    HOLY SHIT THAT MUSIC SCARED ME

  • Jacob English

    YAAAAAYYYY! IMPERIAL LEGION, WE LOVE YOU!

  • Id Yiddeli

    This is absolutely, the most perfect way to handle this scene.

  • http://tezarroex.deviantart.com/ Tezarro

    Best. Night. Ever.

  • Edmond Dantés

    Like eveyone else, I loled. And it was a good one.
    Thanks for not causing it not to be railroaded to the bad end that I was dreading. And thank you for that awesome guard, I will tell tales of his glorious justice.

    • Burgrus of Corgi

      They will tell tales of his bravery. And they shall be tales of valor and true justice.

  • Moof

    wow, what a badass. droppin bandits like flies over here.

  • Jessica U. Ingmann

    I like how this comic has like 10 times the comments as most other comics in this archive. And deservedly so! X3

  • callos

    that guard kicking down the door brought meso close to crapping y pants, im watching this at 2:30 am in the dark speakers on full. i bloody LOVE this comic.

  • Hjgduyhwsgah

    The song playing in the flash sounds like some kind of sped-up version of Red is The Rose.

  • Izzy

    Is it really REALLY sad that I know all the words to the original song played in Katia: Drink up?

  • Evangle

    That video was Brilliant i was so sure that Katia was so gonna fark herself over with the spiked water but i will have more faith in the storyteller from this point on… i know you want to see her succeed as much as we do at this point you have me completely hooked on this story of the young kahjit that goes by the name Katia Managan. I love her

  • Leo

    HOLY SHIT FUCK THAT WAS AWESOME.
    YOU KNOW WHO I IDOLIZE NOW?
    THE IMPERIAL FUCKING LEGION.

  • Massie

    Holy Bawls, I forgot that my volume was so high.

  • Burgrus of Corgi

    I was about to give up on this comic after this page, but now my dedication to it is secured.

  • Tormuse

    No wonder the countess is pissed; she probably has to hire someone to replace that door every time he barges in!

  • Gamer47

    Awesome. Great way to pull the rug out from under us. It’s messed up how he puts hit foot on someones head.

  • Dagda Mor

    That is the best possible way this plot thread could have ended.

  • DarkNexus

    Oh man i was in ribs… my lungs they hurt!

  • kotekzot

    I hope a bit of Katia’s decency rubs off on Quill. Sure, she’s treated Katia with largesse, but she’s also a bit callous. Katia, on the other hand, goes the extra mile to set things right, even though she fails most of the time. Each of them has something to learn from the other.

  • Tygrahof

    love the pose with his boot on the countesses head! lol

  • Prosaladtosser96

    Played this in slow mo. Anyone see quills arms? She was like “JESUS FUCK.” And her arms transformed into deflating balloons. LOOOL.

  • anon314

    HOPY JEGUS FUCK I NEED THAT SONG RIGHT __NOW__ {click click}

  • David Kim

    YES YES.OH YES…THAT FLASH. …

    TOO.
    GOOD.

    10/10

    NO

    11/10

  • Tristan

    That animation was just awesome

  • PersonPerson

    What a red herring! I wonder how many of those people were actually bandits though.

  • EMPeace

    I’m going to officially name that the best animation I’ve seen in…. 4 years… That made my day…

  • Thrime

    Teardrop for motherfucking effect. For motherfucking effect.

  • JaekovKurosaki

    THAT WAS FUCKING AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    BEST WEBCOMIC EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

    id really like to see katia shack up with an actually likeable guy tho. even if its by fueld by alcohol! strike that, especially if its fueld by alcohol!!!

  • D’Varoc

    If ASOTIL doesn’t get his own spin off eventually, I will be furious.

  • Photosynthetic Ziggurat

    I’m surprised Katia knows what a bike is.

  • Voice of random

    i had headphones and max volume when i clicked the flash……. im deaf now.

  • Johan

    I did NOT see that one comming, nearly choked in my coffee, i can see why the countess doesn’t like him, he reminds me of Captain Hammer >_>

  • Nate

    Holyshitholyshitholyshit. Ok so It’s 2 am and I have read all of Katia’s story up to now, then you throw SuidakrA at me. You have made the jump from one of my favorite webcomic/webmininovel(?) to “Sweet Jesus it’s beautiful and made for me specifically”.

  • MentallyUnstable

    *starry eyes* hes got green eyes like me!

    No that is one fucking badass Imperial Soldier. BooYah! Where do I sign up?

  • Smaug

    Ah, the IMPERIAL LEGION,ready to kill for as stolen loaf of bread.

  • Shadowkey392

    Loved that animation! Nice choice of music!

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