Jun 212011

The_Codfish wrote:
Ask him how quickly he travels, though. You want to know if you’ll be able to keep up with his pace, after all. MANY HORRIBLE THINGS COULD HAPPEN if you lagged behind.

The_Codfish wrote:
Yeah, should have mentioned you got a receipt from the Orc. Show it to the guard if you still have it!

PetPeeve wrote:
> Katia: Assume the ”master/blaster” position on The Guard With No Name’s shoulders during the patrol.

Just to be safe, you ask him exactly how fast a “brisk trot” is. You’re not used to traveling long distances and want to make sure you can keep up with him.

The soldier says Imperial Legion Regulation defines a Brisk Trot as exactly three point three miles per hour. Taking into account an average amount of Justice Detours, at this speed you would arrive at Kvatch around midday.

That sounds doable, you say. You also mention the bandit left you a receipt for the robbery, though it’s at your friend’s house right now. Would it help the justice proceedings or anything if you gave that to him tomorrow?

Evidence is always accepted, he says. For all he knows it could end up being a Vital Clue in the apprehension of this Green Scourge.

One last question, you say. Under imperial law, is there anything preventing someone from jumping up onto another person’s shoulders and just kind of riding on top of them?

The soldier tells you that it’s usually not appreciated by the person being ridden, but it is technically acceptable under Imperial Law and therefore absolutely fine to do it whenever you want.

Soadreqm wrote:
>Don’t commit to anything. Say you’ll think about it. Thank him for the offer.

You tell the soldier that you’ll definitely consider joining him tomorrow. You want to check with your friend first. Last time you made simple decisions on your own without explaining every detail to her, you lost all your money, sprained your ankle, almost died in a collapsing ruin, and accidentally had drunken sex with a necromancer.

The soldier says he understands. Regardless of whether or not you join him tomorrow, he wishes you safe travels and an enjoyable citizenship in this proud nation.

This is exciting! You are excited! Tomorrow you are totally going to go all the way to Kvatch and then get all the stuff Quill-Weave wanted and then you’ll repay her for all the damage you did and then get a job and train to be a wizard and eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. You feel like anything is possible. You feel like maybe there’s a chance you won’t fuck this up.

ShadowoftheLotus wrote:
Katia: Consider flailing your arms around the court-area (or whatever it is) that you’re standing in right now to check for invisible persons.

I can’t help but think Gharug Gro-Upp might have been tracking Katia with that invisibility potion or something. And anyways, if anyone gives you a strange look, you can always play it off as suffering from the intense amounts of sugar you ingested.

Just to be safe you claw the air a bit to make sure there are no invisible orcs nearby.

You hadn’t really considered the fact that Gharug could be invisibly watching you right now, and it makes you a little uneasy. You reassure yourself that he would have no reason to follow you, since he already took all your stuff. That would be a waste of time and money, something a businessman like himself wouldn’t do. You’re safe. You hope.

Maybe later you’ll ask Quill-Weave if there’s anything you can do to see invisible people.

McFrugal wrote:
Holy crap 4:30 is early. We’ll miss the soup kitchen if we leave then. Up to you, Katia.

The_Codfish wrote:
Also hey, forgot that the soup kitchen would open up at the time. This is problematic. If she doesn’t eat, she might not be able to keep up with the guard. If she does, she won’t have his protection. SOLUTIONS?

Ration your cake, Katia!

You’re a grown woman, you can get away with skipping breakfast every once in a while. Seriously.

It probably is time to end your cake binge, though. You find one of the servants and get him to wrap the rest up for you.

Tenebrais wrote:
> Inform Quill-Weave of your plans and ask what she thinks you should do. The whole reason you want to go to Kvatch is as a favour to her, so you should make sure she’s still willing to entrust you with the task. Remember what happened last time you tried to surprise her.

You find your way back to Quill-Weave and tell her the soldier’s offer. You’ve never traveled with a soldier before but you think it would be a lot safer than going on your own and you ask Quill-Weave if she thinks the same.

She agrees that it is a good plan. She was hoping you’d find someone safe to travel with, and there’s few people safer than an Imperial Legionnaire. Anyway, he seems like a good guy. A little murderous, but a good guy overall.

Mirdini wrote:
And then get some sleep as it is surely late already and 4:30 is a pretty early time to be leaving the city.

On the way back to her place you tell Quill-Weave all about how you were really nervous at the beginning of the dinner but then by the end you had pretty much overcome your countess-phobia. You’re proud of yourself; you never thought that was something you could accomplish. And if that’s possible, who knows what else you have in you.

You think this might have been the best day you’ve had in… well, forever.

Quill-Weave says she’s glad you enjoyed yourself.

You thank her again for inviting you. It meant a lot. Oh, and watch out for the bathtub that is inconveniently placed in your walkway.

She thanks you for the warning. It’s late, so she’ll just dump that in the morning. Goodnight.

acerbicAves wrote:
Er…she’s letting you crash at her place again right?

Er, about that…

Back at dinner you told the Countess that I run errands for you in exchange for a place to stay. I’m pretty sure that was just a cover story so you didn’t have to admit I was an alcoholic who repeatedly breaks into your house, buuuuut is there any chance the whole “giving me a place to stay” could be a real thing?

Quill-Weave tells you that the idea behind cover stories is that they are not real things. Otherwise they wouldn’t be cover stories, they’d just be the truth. Aren’t you in the Mages Guild? Can’t you just stay there?

You explain that you visited the guild, but weren’t accepted in yet. Evidently to even apply you must “display proficiency” with at least two spells and be able to carry 150 pounds of books. They said the second one was very important for wizards. So yeah you kind of need a place to crash tonight.

You’ve seen my house, Quill-Weave says. There’s just one bed and a whole lot of cold stone floors.

  • Blast

    3.3 mph? If you’re not going at least 4 mph and possibly 6 you’re a pansy. D:<

    • dow

      It’s as if it’s a little… too brisk.

    • Zack

      How about you try walking at six miles an hour for six and a half hours straight before calling people who walk at a slower speed then that pansies and making mean faces at them, hmm?

      • Dan

        Not that hard, did a 50 mile walk averaging about 4 miles an hour before. The first 20, we were probably going about
        5 mph.

        • nb109

          Treadmills don’t count! In real life, the ground doesn’t move for you.

        • SplinteredReverence

          Try that again, but fully suited in iron armor.

      • Snow_cat.

        I did somthing similar with my roomate. While attending university while carrying about 25kg of kit + laundry we would catch my roommate’s dad at his workplace (and get a free ride home) for the weekend. Though that was closer to three hours not six.

        I never called anyone ‘pansies’ while doing so, though after the first hour I had a tendancy to make ‘mean’ faces at any person who would heckle us.

    • It was on average, including time it takes to arrest criminal scum.

      • tech

        out of how many legionnaires? ten thousand? a million?

  • khooleeo

    *sings* “…Let’s sleep together, right now…”
    I hope they will.

  • ShiningLily

    …Please dont let her fall into the tub….

  • Uncannyscarecrow

    The master/blaster position” link is broken can you please fix it 😮

    • Kazerad

      Ack, good catch. I went ahead and rehosted the file he linked.

  • a666

    Justice detours!
    I fucking died of laughter.

  • dtlux14

    On the hard ground or blood and paint covered bed? BEST THING EVER!