Mar 312013

contemptibleComedian wrote:
What’s the purpose of the weird dreams
How unique is your condition
Why cultists

EveryZig wrote:
Don’t ask why you are having these nightmares; a god of nightmares might take that the wrong way.
Instead, ask why you keep having the same nightmare.

With the monster adequately pacified, you retrieve your list and begin your questioning proper.

You start with the basics, reading your notes word-for-word. “Demon. For nearly fifteen years now, my every sleeping night has been haunted by horrible nightmares-”

You’re welcome.

“-And yet, every night it is the same vision. I am alone in a room with a vile, dangerous… cultist.”

Cultist? Cultists aren’t even…” she trails off and, after a brief hesitation, continues: “Does the dream leave you terrified?

“It fills me with reasonable apprehension.”

Is that like fear?

“It is functionally identical to fear.”

Then you are right to be scared, mortal, for Vaermina knows your every fear and has shown you a mere fraction of her horrible power! It is through my dark bidding that, every night, you are subjected to these horrors, and it is through my mercy that you awaken every morning in a cold sweat.

“So you’ve been tormenting me for years with these nightmares?”

Torment is my sphere, and nightmares my realm. There is certainly no other entity who could be behind it.

“And why, demon, is it the same dream every night? What meaning is there?”

A mere mortal could not possibly understand the motives of a god. When Vaermina feeds you these visions – when she casts your mind into that… room full of cultists – it is a gift from her all-knowing will. You have no right to question it.

“It’s just one cultist.”


“The room is just filled with one cultist.”

How can a room be filled with one cultist?

“Sometimes he’s really big.”

That is correct!

Vaermina was testing you. About her nightmare, she gave you.

May Vaermina speak with this mortal alone?

Additional resource credit:
Squiggles – priceless works of art

  • Deimos


  • Endeity

    A nightmare that spawned not from the Prince of Nightmares herself. How very curious…

    • Endeity

      …..i will forever cherish the priceless art that is that mural

      • Maulkin

        Is it just me, or is the floating paintbrush a nod at the glitch in the game?

        • xKiv

          It wouldn’t be the first time, would it?

  • steampunkLocket

    Is Sworddog trying to fetch the staff for Vaermina? X3
    He seems so happy in this update too

    • 65534

      He guards the staff from a thief that he probably senses with his sword sense.

      • Gren

        Sworddog is female, guys.

  • stupidjellyfish

    Worst. God. Ever.

    • Tech

      No, the bunny god from LFG was the worst god ever.

  • Edd

    Clueless nightmare Prince

  • Varg

    So, lets see what we got here.
    Either it was not her doing, or she is not Vaermina at all! But I’m sure it’s the first – Daedra princes are arrogant yet not really as omniscient as they claim to be (except Sheogorath).

    • 65534

      Buy Sheogorath just happens to be the only Daedric Prince that can be summoned by mistake.
      Except he always looks like his normal (well, mad) self, and probably wouldn’t care about painting.

      • Dr. Cynic

        Actually, he would probably love painting. Or hate it. Or both! Painting is an excellent way of capturing the very heart of madness, and indeed many such madmen paint. Or scribble. Or throw stuff at a canvas and call it painting shortly before strangling themselves with their own intestines. Sad, really.

        • Cactus Juice

          Actually Sheogorath’s sphere is both madness and CREATIVITY. So painting, music, a good book. Those are all things he’d like. He’d also like a severed head dipped in cheese.

        • kitsunebeast

          I totally just read your comment in Sheogorath’s voice. It fits perfectly. XD

        • 65534

          I mean, he probably has nothing against painting, but surely he already has plenty of people who paint, and brightly colored things under his control. He wouldn’t have problems with obtaining paint already, thus, not impressed.

          Vaermina, on the other hand, has nothing but bleak, horrifying nightmares, so she is not accustomed to bright colors and probably never had paint in her realm.

        • Kagji

          This. This is the single greatest thing I have ever read in a comment.

        • Dragon

          Madness does have a close connection to creativity. There are many creators whose quality of work dramatically fell after they were “cured”.

    • Expresate

      They’re omniscient when it comes to their sphere, but they’re weaker in Mundus. So.

      • Expresate

        Actually, I take half of that back. Just like you wouldn’t know every little thing going on in your body, the Aedra or Daedra wouldn’t know every little thing going on in their sphere. So maybe not really omniscient. But then no creature in TES really is.

        • Varg

          Yeah, I’m the one who should be taking things back. Omniscient is a bit too much. AND we are talking about Vaermina (who, let’s face it, is not the coolest or the strongest Daedra prince). But the point is – she did not send the nightmares to Gaius and Katia.

    • Erikulum

      all hail Sheogorath

      • Sheogorath

        I agree

        • Haskill

          Praying to yourself, my Lord? That’s not a good sign. Or perhaps it is. Prince of Madness, and all that.

  • Ardent

    Maybe you should have gone with Hermaeus Mora instead, Gaius. If you want knowledge, and you’ll summon a Daedric Prince to get it, you might as well go with the one who experiences all of time as one. If anything as of yet established other than Vaermina were to be sending visions like these, Herma-Mora would be the one, especially since it’s messing with Vaermina… But that would be predictable, wouldn’t it?

    • Murder

      The problem is… how do you pacify the most knowledgeable entity in existence? I’m under the impression that Hermaeus Mora is so saturated with omniscience that xir doesn’t give a shit about anything anymore.

    • Hide-of-Scales

      But why would Herma-More be sending these visions? We’ve seen Katia’s nightmares (and its safe to assume Gaius’ dreams are almost identical, but with a “cultist” instead of the Emperor), and I don’t quite see what those have to do with knowledge of any sort.

      Unless… Herma-Mora is also the daedric prince of fate (or the “scrying of the tides of fate,” whatever that means). Given what we know about the Oblivion Crisis, it could be interpreted that something bad’s coming and it involves the Emperor and cultists. But I still don’t see what Hermaeus Mora would have to gain from sending these nightmare-like visions – he gains no new power, followers, nor knowledge from doing so.

      Besides, I can’t imagine he’d be much help even if he was summoned, unless you’re trying to look for a means to stop the nightmares (such a special potion, a spell, or maybe even forbidden/lost knowledge from one of his unholy Black Books… assuming the summoner doesn’t go mad reading it).

  • furnut

    Wow…even the prince knew something is odd. WAT WILL HAPPEN NAST!!11oneone??///forwardslash

    PS: Keep up the great updating working, Kazrad! 😀 😀

  • Internet Buttstalker

    Allow her to continue torment your dreams, with one condition:
    Hugs every week.

  • Unclever title

    Maybe you’re just crazy after all, Gaius.

  • dude


    I like it, thank you.

  • Nodzilla96

    Well, someone done fucked up now.

  • Trance

    “Then you are right be scared, mortal”

    • Kazerad

      Whoops, looks like you found today’s careless word omission. Thanks!

  • Varis

    Vaermina is so full of shit. I love it.

    • tronn

      This update had me laughing out loud the first time in a long while, and I love it! It’s all the little things, from the ‘You’re welcome’ to the insipid face being painted on the wall, to the sworddog being clueless and to the Daedric prince of nightmares being, well, full of shit.

      • Yarrr

        There’s something amusing about the lord of nightmares being full of rubbish. Like real nightmares really.

        Also is that meant to be a snow elf on the wall there?

        • tronn

          It’s meant to be a horrifying nightmare beyond the pale, that’s what’s it.

  • FuzzyZergling

    The best Prince of Nightmares.
    The. Best.

  • Myufi

    Sworddog: Bark.

  • Expresate


    Kazerad, are you the Daedric Prince of Hilarity and SwordDog?

    Yes, SwordDog is now a metaphysical concept.

    • HoochieKookoo

      Why are all the Prequel fans so damned smart, using words like “metaphysical” and “insipid”? ^.^ Truly one of the best fanbases.

      • Expresate

        so much metaphysical stuff in the extended TES lore it’s not even funny.

  • NoriMori

    Oh my God that was hilarious. XD

  • NoriMori

    I just noticed Sworddog in the last few panels. Impossibly adorable!

  • Lobster

    So, Vaermina wants to talk to SwordDog alone? That is who she is pointing at, right?

    • Varg

      Looks like I’m not alone :0

    • LP

      Who says Sword-Dog is mortal?

  • Ace

    When the Daedric Prince of Nightmares has no clue what you’re talking about, it’s not a good sign.

  • Internet Buttstalker

    Kiss the godess! DO IT! Why?

    ..she’s haaaawt.

    • stupidjellyfish

      It’s the cleavage, I know.

  • Prophet Lord

    That last panel really bothers me for some reason. The way Sworddogs foot is separated but the staff goes right through the rift.

    • tronn

      That is disturbing, even more so because she doesn’t seem to mind at all.

  • Red-Rock-Run

    Sworddog is so precious.

  • Kaze’aze

    I came here to waste comment space for one thing: Lol.

  • M

    Is that Clavicus Vile’s face she’s drawing?

    • Pumpkins

      I’m pretty sure that that is the bosmer.

      • M

        Oh yeah… it was that slashy M/M/M/M-ish mural. I didn’t recognize that. Thought it was Clavicus Vile without the horns, because I didn’t think of that mural.

        Huh, also if Vaermina isn’t responsible for the nightmare… well who is? Sheogorath is known to hang out in minds, but after fifteen years it didn’t exactly drove Gaius or Katia insane.

        Maybe Mehrunes Dagon? Since this is the prequel to the Oblivion crisis… Or perhaps, not a Daedra of any sorts at all…

        • tronn

          Neither Gaius or Katia are shining examples of ‘sane’, though. One is a paranoid wreck, other hears voices.

  • Somethings not right here, Vaermina, a daedra prince(ess) would never ask a mortal for permission.
    Vaermina asked ” May I speak with this mortal alone?”

    Why the hell would a daedra prince or princess ask for a mortal’s approval?

    No, you see….
    That can’t be Vaermina, that is not the real Vaermina.

    Sigrid is just setting up another big hoax. She is fulling Gaius with her trickery.

    • Prophet Lord

      Or it could be because the Cabal is the one that summoned her and is sustaining the rift.

      • tobi2500

        Even Sheogorath[spelling?] considers mortals to be under him. He refered to the player in skyrim as “disposable” or something like that. So a non-insane daedric prince would most certainly not ask a mortal for permision.
        However the cultist dude in the corner, does seem to be the one “sustaining the rift” so things are not certain either way.

        • Prophet Lord

          When you meet Sheogorath in Oblivion, you either talk to him through a statue or in his own realm. I believe the Cabal Mage is sort of Anchoring her to Mundus. So she isn’t as much asking for permission, but asking the summoner for help in either clearing the room or moving locations.

  • Vincent

    That face she’s painting… It’s familiar.

    Like, ethnically-diverse familiar.

  • Steve Potluck

    Kaz, you misspelled the word “apprehension”.

    • Kazerad

      Wait are you sure? It looks super-right to me. It’s spelled just how you spelled it, unless I am missing another usage of the word that I misspelled so badly that I can’t even recognize it as apprehension anymore.

      • Steve Potluck

        April Fools.

        • Kazerad

          Oh you monster. ;D Good one.

          • Steve Potluck

            Thanks, I was apprehensive as to if it would work or not.

          • Fouad

            Oho! It is funny because apprehension is the word being contested!

          • Kaze’aze

            Go back to the Pawtucket Brewery.

  • BlueNight

    So s/he did it again. As I scrolled down, I saw the animated gif with her hovering the paintbrush and acting all spooky. So I said out loud, “She’s acting all spooooky” in a somewhat patronizing tone.

    The very next panel was her staring directly at me.

    That’s the second update in a row she’s stared directly at me in a creepy way.

  • bodug

    Paintbrush Glitch!

  • Link

    Best update in a long time xD

    Might be that I’m sick and sleep depraved but I kept laughing at Vaerminas cluelessness for much too long =P
    I can almost hear the gears in her head creaking as they try to figure out what’s actually going on.**

    Sworddog is also very amusing in this, the expression in the 7th panel is adorable =D

  • Kathy

    Did anyone else notice that the right-most candle is only lit in the final scene?

    • tronn

      No, it’s lit in every scene, it’s just hard to see against the white background.

  • Laufente

    I love everything about this.

  • NorskVind

    Probably just being nit-picky, but the last panel has sworddog’s leg going behind the purple cloud and ending at the other side of the summoning circle. It makes it look like that rear leg is about 6-7 feet long. Not sure if done on purpose or not.

    • NorskVind

      Disregard my previous post, realized it is on purpose as vaermina’s presence is actually displacing time and space.

  • Curious Argonian

    Why is the Daedric Prince of Nightmares asking for permission? Also, I’ve seen the cultist person referred to as Cabal, would someone mind explaining him?

    • Expresate

      Probably just asking for the others to leave the room or something.

      As for Cabal, the Daedra summoners in the Mages Guild in Daggerfall (the game) were called the Cabal. Kazerad based the summoner we see up there on the Cabal from Daggerfall. That’s why.

  • ParadoxRox

    And that’s how the daedric Prince if Nightmares became the best character in Prequel.

  • CGHL

    The old woman is just a clever ruse. The real Vaermina is actually Sword-dog in disguise!

  • Relth

    Something tells me Vaermina doesn’t know sh*t about Gaius’s condition. She only haunts people for her own pleasure, not for some divine prophecy. How is she going to help him?

    And more importantly, how can she help Katia with HER nightmares? Who else could she ask?

  • ChetBetera

    Gaius: Resist urge to pimp-slap the taste out of this Deadra.

    • tobi2500

      forget resisting it, DO IT

      • Kaze’aze

        Forget submitting, POST IT HERE.

    • ChetBetera

      It was intended as a joke since I doubt that pimp-slapping any sort of god-like entity is good idea or conducive to the creation of good ideas.

  • Mangulwort

    Why didn’t Gaius summon Hermaeus Mora? He know everything that will happen and everything that has happened. He know how all worlds will die and how to kill a Daedric Prince. He will obviously know what the nightmares are about.

    • He probably doesn’t know all the daedra.

      • Mangulwort

        He is the lord of FATE and KNOWLEDGE. Why whouldint he know about all the daedra?

        • No, Gaius probably doesn’t know all the daedra.

          • Mangulwort

            I never thought of that. personaly I never chould remeber all the nine divine becuase most of them are boring. Daedra princes are never boring.

    • cheesybob1

      It’s not his summoning day.

    • Dagda Mor

      Herma-Mora always has some sinister angle he’s working. Vaermina is hardly pleasant, but her machinations are much easier to see through.

  • Kazerad, have you ever thought about a sound update?

    • Cheesedragon, that’s not what I meant.

      by sound update I mean an update with just sound and no images.

  • Cheesedragon

    The whole “same panel 4 times” gag is getting a bit stale.

    Still funny though.

  • Timeheart

    I get the feeling that this one doesn’t even know what he’s been dreaming. So they may not even be coming from her. If so, where are they actually coming from then?

  • Gaius is quickly becoming one of my fav characters in this adventure. I just love how he’s not moved by the prince’s answer, calling him out on BS without saying anything.

  • BaronvonSomething

    Hey, Kazerad. I just wanted to remind you that if you don’t post today, it’s ALADDIN FANFICTION TIME!

  • Willhelm

    My gut is telling me that Vearmina is actually a skilled painter. And she believes in ethnic diversity.

  • Internet Buttstalker

    Ask Vaermina if she can exchange your nightmare to a dream with Sworddog and a midget.

  • BaronvonSomething

    Hhhhhheeeeeeyyyyyy Kaaaaaaazzzzzeeeeerrrraaaddddd….


  • Dagda Mor

    Where did SWORDDOG’s swords go?

    • Trance

      Retracted into her body. For social occasions.

  • The bullshit omeeter is through the roof what a crapy illusion

  • Cory Brandstetter

    So thats how the mural was made

  • dtlux14

    I love how she paints. I wonder what the nightmares are about, and how it is connected to Katia’s.

    PS: Have some stuff I made in MA Paint